Federer and Nadal: Fit of Laughter During Shooting

If you're a Federer or Nadal fan (tennis), you may enjoy this short attempt at a commercial.

Inner Programming

Donovan and I have been on a short journey of recognizing our ego and how it affects our relationship. Generally, it is most noticeable when one of us has a word of correction or advice for the other (anybody else out there hear me?!). Defensiveness seems to be the clearest sign to me that my ego is taking over.

I just discovered another layer of this defensiveness within myself when having a heated discussion with my lover. One wall is called:

I don’t like your tone, it isn’t very loving.

The other is called:

I don’t like your choice of words, it isn’t very loving.

In other words, if you don’t have a kind tone & loving words, I’m not going to listen to you!

Don’t get me wrong, a loving tone matched with timely words is worth growing into; however, we must ask ourselves if it has become a “legitimate reason” for why we won’t listen to what a person is trying to tell us. This is a huge blockage for me – especially in my marriage.

See, Donovan was trying to alert me to a pattern he sees me repeating over and over…however, I usually don’t want to hear about it, because I don’t want to take action on it, it feels safe being stuck in what I know!

The ego wants to prove itself & protect itself. When we are able to put it aside (for a bit), we realize we have nothing to prove because we have already been approved by our Creator, need we more approval than that?! Well, often we think we do because we do not know in our depths that we are approved and protected by our Heavenly Papa.

Word.

Lotion Journeys

I've been trying to learn how to make a good lotion without all of those nasty parabens (harmful preservative found in most lotions we buy). I was told by a pro that it took her around 40 tries...hmmm...this may take awhile.

Yesterday, I turned on some Christmas music & instead of baking cookies, tried to make some Christmas lotion...the process went so smooth that I excitedly called Amy about my amazing luck. The consistency was thin, but hey, it'd be great for summer & used as body lotion.

Unfortunately something went wacky with my scent...when I came home in the evening and asked Mark & Dono what they thought the lotion smelled like, they said, "stinky socks" It's hard to let go of a whole batch gone bad.

The "stinky feet" lotion

Surrendering to our Truth Worth

The other day this line entered my brain circuit:

“Surrender to your True Worth already!” (yet, once)

So many of us succumb to common thought processes where we judge ourselves to be better or worse than others. We find ourselves doing this with people or situations where we feel uncomfortable or insecure. Perhaps it’s at a social gathering, at the mall, with our families, or in class. When I think of my own battles and voice them, they sound so superficial: Am I less of a person because somebody dresses more stylish than me? Am I more valuable because I know more theology than the person sitting next to me? If so-and-so has more friends than me, does that make me less loveable/valuable? If I’m helping more people than you are, does it mean I’m more likeable?

Often I have had to work on, talk about, and pray about such. However, sometimes I think it can be as “simple” as a matter of surrender. As simple as saying “no” to the drama of it all. I was gifted and surprised by this the other day as I uttered a sacred word of surrender when I was tempted to succumb to this common struggle. Very refreshing!

Enjoying a massage from Auntie

Getting ready to go for a swim

Being silly with Abby

Hiking in the hills

Having fun in the leaves

Playing on Grandpa's bus

Trying on Auntie's hat and mitts

Capital Self & Capital Work

Two important questions:

1. Who are you? Not as self but as Self?
2. Why are you here? What is your Work not work.

The small "self" and the small "work" will answer these questions in terms of what you have accomplished. Example: I went to bible college for a year, did missions, worked at a shelter, worked at camp, helped my impovershed neighbours...OR...I am a mom, I am a teacher...

The capital "Self" and capital "Work" have to do with the grounded and rich Truth of who you are in the eyes of God and your "Work" naturally flows out of this. This "Self" and "Work" are generally not your vocation and resume, but are something your deepest parts know you are called to. Often, it takes periods of silence, prayer, and reflection to answer these questions.

For myself, sitting with these questions has been incredibly powerful and difficult. On one hand it is freeing to learn that my worth and life's work are beyond performance, but on the other hand it takes discipline to change my thinking in terms of my true identity and work.

For example: Part of my life's work is to be interiorly quiet, to abide in Christ, to speak the Truth, and to be a fresh lens for others to see God through. As I sat with this, it felt wonderful and inspiring. However, this requires a shift in my day to day life. If my life's "Work" is to be quiet, I must make such a priority. So before baking tonight, I must first practice this silence and right now this looks like Centering Prayer.

How 'bout you?

May we have the courage to ask these questions, and to live out of our true selves as we do our true work.

Adapted from Ron Martoia's blog post http://velocityvortx.wordpress.com/2008/03/16/living-from-big-s-and-w/

Calendula Salve & Vanilla

Vanilla Extract: Slice the vanilla bean in half
Stick vanilla beans in jar and top up with Vodka. Shake jar everyday for 4-6 weeks and voila --your very own vanilla extract!

Vanilla Body Oil: Chop up vanilla bean and fill jar with jojoba oil. Let it sit on a sunny windowsill for about a month. Done and done.

Pictured below: Calendula flowers in Amy's garden

Collect the flower heads.

Simmer in olive oil for about 20 minutes.

Add beeswax and you have a salve that is handy to put on sensitive skin, minor cuts, bruises and bites. You'll often find Calendula in soaps and moisturizers for skin that is easily irritated.

This was my favourite body recipe because we were able to grow & harvest it ourselves. I did an experiment with the salve where I only put it on the mosquito bites on Luke's left cheek (at bedtime) and sure enough, the next morning they were less inflammed than the ones on his right cheek. Since then I have used it on blistered fingers and scrapes. So far so good! Fun to know the stuff actually works.

This post is dedicated to Naomi Kroeker's fiance Tim. Tim I have never met you but thank-you for support and excitement as we try to make our own natural body products!!

Amy's Prayer

May we be keen listeners to the voice of grace as we continue on a path of freedom from evaluating ourselves, comparing ourselves, and living our lives based on people’s responses to us.

May we accept the mystery of our own realities; and in doing so occupy our own lives with optimism, with enthusiasm, with honesty, with hope.

That we might wake up in light and not darkness
Free from fear of living and of dying.

That our eyes would be open to the wide and beautiful generosity that God dwells in us as ourselves.

That we would know joy and peace and that mysterious judgment of God- which is always an expression of liberation and freedom

For divine generosity, for good company, I am grateful.
It is a good time to be alive.
May we receive the gift.

Prayed by Amy Bergman Loewen on her 25th birthday.

Summer Randoms

Sugar-wheat-free beet muffins

Summer reading

Luke & Auntie watching the parade

Cousins breaking in the new gazebo

Lots of play-time outside

First optometrist appointment

Our own Martha Stewart getting ready to serve us at her 25th b-day party!

Amy had planned an entire afternoon full of amazing eats, games, an awesome sing-a-long (she typed out song books for us!), a prayer, and rhubarb slushy which served us well on a smokin' hot afternoon! Did I mention she stitched each of us a fan for the day & sent us home with jars of homemade granola?!

This is the first thing the guests saw upon arrival.

Undoubtedly, one of the most amazing-meaningful parties. Not sure I want to attempt any myself after this...

Manitoba's Best Coffee

I had to do an entry about Green Bean Coffee.

http://www.greenbeancoffeeimports.com/



They are Manitoba's first certified organic & fairtrade roaster. I pick mine up at Organza located at confusion corner in Winnipeg. They are also available at Sobeys. So far I have only sampled their Sumatra, which is intoxicatingly smooth & earthy.



Their Company's Mission Statement: "To maintain our passion and believe in what we do. Achieve sustainability while being socially, environmentally and ethically responsible; be more than a "just-for-profit" entity."

Sounds good to me!

Andy gets Scriptural!

I feel kind of geeky writing an instructive devotional today, but I just felt like studying the Word and I suppose this blog is my outlet right now. I was inspired by a friend whose bible study group gathers to read only from their bibles and commentaries –-and it sounded kinda refreshing. Ephesians 4 starts out as follows:

I…beg you to lead a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called (NRSV)

I want you to get out there and walk—better yet, run!—on the road God called you to travel. (The Message)

Can you picture Paul pleading passionately with the church??!!

He is referring to a calling that we have received not one we have acquired through self-effort (says my commentary). He is crying out for us to live a congruent life through word and deed that our faith will show itself in our relationships. Here are the Four Qualities necessary to nourish healthy relationships:

Humbleness or Humility
Gentleness
Patience
Bearing with one another in love

I love how straight forward and simple that sounds. Four qualities that are powerful relational binders. I tried to imagine a marriage built on these four ingredients or a conflicted relationship, this Paul guy definitely knows what he’s talking about. On Thursday at the Leadership Summit (a bunch of speakers via satellite), Jim Collins stated that the quality that separates Great leaders from good leaders is humility. Not surprising when you think of the leaders in your life that have impacted you. Something that often impacted me as a child was the many times my parents apologized to me. They would often say, “hey, I’m sorry I got it wrong and you had to pay for how I acted.” Humility seems to have an upside down power to dissolve defences. Although it may show itself to be meek & mild, when the ego is able to step aside….look out…reconciliation and healing are close at hand.

Listening Exercise: Ask Jesus to highlight one of these qualities that he wants you to be aware of today as you are chatting with those you come in contact with. For me today, Jesus highlighted patience…specifically reminding me that I must have grace for others faults, habits, and quirks as I have many of them myself and am in need of their graces. Next, if you so desire, ask someone that you live with which ones you do well and which ones may need some work. Donovan thought I did humility well, to which I laughed because I recognize the many times my ego does the talking. He said the one I do the least is gentleness—I can get snappy if ya know what I mean!

Humility, Gentleness, Patience, & Love be present in our relationships today.

Summer so far...

Wimbeldon Waffles complete with fresh strawberries and whip cream. Watching my spanish boyfriend Rafael Nadal whip Tomas Berdych in the finals. Notice Dono behind the waffle station.

So big!

Finally got a pic of him sleeping! I've always been too scared he'd wake up. I get up with him 2x a night & nurse. It used to be just once, but then teething season came again.

I have doubled my caffeine intake since becoming a mom.

St. Malo with our cell group.

Bath time!

Hope as a Discipline

“The Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness can never extinguish it”

(John 1:5)

I don’t know about you, but I quickly become overwhelmed when I hear about everything that’s going on around us: oil spills, food injustice, the protests in Toronto, the fear that presently exists due to Earl Giesbrecht in A-town, the recent murder/suicide in New Bergthal…oh yeah, and the earthquake that occurred north of Ottawa!!?? I had no clue that was possible…is the world about to end??!!

At a prayer team meeting last week, my friend Candice shared a story about an unseen man. Since Candice lives by the Gallery in the Park (Altona’s art gallery, garden, & fountain), every morning from about 7 – 11 am she sees him weed, water, and prune the gallery’s garden. Few see him, but MANY enjoy the results of a beautifully tended garden in the afternoon and evening. The moral of the story being that the prayers we pray, the small acts of kindness we perform, and the Light we bring to others may go unnoticed, but they help to expand and multiply goodness, hope, and love. These acts leave a trail of beauty and goodness behind us.

And so, it is a discipline to recognize that each one of us performing our “small acts” impact our environment for good. It is a discipline when I watch the news to recall and proclaim that darkness cannot overtake Light – and that is very good news.

“The Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness cannot overcome it”

Thank-you Candice for sharing such a powerful image. The Gallery in the Park has become a new experience for me.

The Work of Surrender

“…let yourselves by pulled into a way of life shaped by God’s life.” 1 Peter 1

Our ability to adapt to a new situation may say a lot about us. My experience with change often reveals a lot of the things in my life that I like to have control over. A sense of control in life usually enables us to feel sane and a consistent schedule is found to be healthy for most.

Enter first born son.

The control I like to have over the cleanliness of my house, to cook when I want, to read, to run, to have quiet time, and to go out with friends all flew out the window. Yes, I know it is only a season. However, it has been very revealing with regards to how many of my days I spend fighting to have my old life back. Fighting leads to frustration. Frustration to defeat. The days I am able to genuinely let go of the list I want to accomplish leave me feeling a lot more energized than the days when I fight tooth and nail to accomplish that list. When I’m able to embrace whatever the day holds (hard or easy), I find it becomes an invitation to allow the Spirit to do the work that He Wills, which is usually the work of surrender.

All this to say that I think this is the daily work of Spirituality and Transformation. The work of Surrender. Perhaps even the Way of the Cross.

“If your religious practice is nothing more than to remain sincerely open to the ongoing challenges of life and love, you will find God – and also yourself. Keeping the heart spaces and mind spaces open, sometimes even “in hell” is the essential work of spirituality…Great people keep adjusting to what life offers them and what life demands of them. Even the intelligence of animals is measured by their ability to cleverly adjust to new circumstances. Why should we be any different” (Rohr, The Naked Now)

Food Inc - Official Trailer [HD]

Donovan & I watched this documentary this past weekend. It was chilling, horrifying, and inspiring all at once! I highly recommend watching this one as most of us make food choices everyday which can exploit or enhance our relationships with the earth, each other, and animals.

Miracle on 4th Ave

(Drumroll please)

On Luke's first birthday, May 21, we went to go see a Homeopath about his eczema & sleep issues. His remedy was as follows:

1. Colic remedy in the morning to aid digestion (sleep & skin related)


2. 2 stomach massages per day to aid digestion


3. No naps longer than 30 minutes (I thought this was crazy!)


4. Calming/Sleep remedy around 5 pm


5. Sleep training: Letting him cry 5 minutes, saying our cue word, "night-night" which he clearly understands (3 cycles of this till 15 min at which we would rub his back and say our cue word again. Repeat over & over till asleep)


6. Nursing once a night

The first two nights the longest session of sleep training lasted 1 - 1/2 hours. I thought it would be way worse! Anyways, previously I would go to Luke anywhere from 5-10x/night. Now, I go to him once in the night & that is only to nurse. If he fusses at night, it is only for a couple of minutes (we leave multiple soothers in his crib) & he resolves it himself! Who is this kid!!!

Like I said, Miracle on 4th Ave. Thank the good Lord! Our lives have changed dramatically for the past 5 nights and we are still in shock...

Unfailing Love

Let your unfailing love surround us, O Lord, for our hope is in you alone.

Surrounded, enveloped, sandwiched.

Overcome.

The very thing I didn’t know I longed for.

As I have had a difficult time with YET MORE sleep training, I have been starting to imagine what this sort of love means in the middle of a frustrating night. I have been finding the beauty of allowing myself to trust & fall into this love substance that surrounds my household as we try to find rest.

Here are a couple more things the Psalms say about His unfailing love:

The earth is FULL of it.
It rest upon us as we hope in Him.
It is priceless.

This is good news friends!

My First Year of Parenting Has Taught Me:

1. The value of tuning into my intuition

2. The value of learning to self-regulate. Baby goes to sleep better when I’m in a state of calm and control.

3. Most parents do not want advice unless they ask. What we most need is a listening ear, empathy, & support for our own choices as a family.

4. Comparing children or parenting styles is often a dead end unless it is done with a learners mind. Each child & family is uber unique & we are invited to honour our differences rather than judging or feeling threatened by them.

5. The importance of asserting my own boundaries. Although this has proved to be challenging, it is of utmost importance for mental, emotional, spiritual, physical & relational health.

6. Most male bathrooms still don’t have change tables! Seriously it is 2010!

7. Breastfeeding in public is STILL seen as offensive to some. CBC radio: A woman was recently feeding her child at the PanAm pool & was asked to stop by one of the workers because it was offensive. Next day, a whole crew of woman went to the pool to breastfeed their babies! Now that’s creative non-violent action!

Body Justice

Last week Amy and I got together to make (ahem): Face Cleanser, toner, moisterizer, hand soap, lip balm, mouthwash, & bum spray (for Dono of course...ok just jokes for Lukey). We ordered a recipe book from Amy's hero http://angrychicken.typepad.com/ and went hard. We have ordered most of our ingredients from http://www.mountainroseherbs.com/ (awesome website!!), Aveda (they have great Essential Oils), Tiber River (Manitoba-made body products), and health food stores.

Pictured above is our homemade handsoap. We did the easy way of melting soap flakes in hot water, adding glycerin and essential oil. I scented mine Rosemary & love it. My favourite thing about it is that it doesn't dry your skin out.

The facial oil and toner are our favourites. The Toner is mainly chamomile tea and an essential oil, we used ylang-ylang, a refreshing scent. I highly recommend it. The facial oil was basically almond oil with your choice of essential oil. If you want to sample any let me know. It's cost effective, products are fairly traded (to my knowledge) & it's an empowering way to be in control of your own body products.

Next up, Amy & I are going to attempt to sow, grow, & harvest our own herbs this summer...wish us luck!

My New Plan for Happiness

Step One:

Deprive yourself of a necessity such as shelter, food, water, air, or sleep for about 6 months. I personally recommend depriving oneself of sleep as it gives the mind less perspective, allowing you to feel the shift towards insanity.

Step Two:

After about six months introduce one of these back into your day. Voila! Instant happiness!!! You won’t care about the things you used to...you will just be glad to be alive!!

Yes, you guessed it…I had a great night last night…two sessions of 4 hours from my dear bambino after a couple of horrific nights.

I feel like hugging trees, bugs, strangers, & rocks. It’s great to be alive today! Thank-you Jesus!

Sesame Street - "A Cookie is a Sometime Food"

My brother did one of his health practicums at an elementary school and showed this video to the kids. I had to share this little diddy because whenever my mom brings over Dono's favourite monster cookies, I eat the majority of them before he gets to them! Terrible, I know.

This is also dedicated to Christal - she also has issues with eating too many cookies. Christal - cookies are a sometime food ok?!

Swinging at Great Grandma's